Now the Ding Ding Ding has come to a stop and flight attendant Al has left the cabin.
The tension in the air was palatable.
I could hear people mumbling about this delay making them miss their connections.
I could hear other passengers asking each other if this was a reality TV show.
I could hear those in closest proximity talking about the total disrespect, disregard and lack of common courtesy this individual flight attendant was showing to the passengers.
I now found myself sitting next to a business colleague who was asking me if they were going to show up in Chicago by themselves.
I thought to myself; Is it possible in the United States of America for a federal marshal to forcibly remove me from an airplane for asking the question, “Is it possible that safety and respect are not mutually exclusive?”
I also realized that out of consideration for all my fellow passengers and especially for my business partner, that this situation necessitated that I immediately go into my jelly fish survival mode.
When I was younger, I was a lifeguard and learned the jelly fish survival mode. Basically, the jelly fish survival mode is when one is lost in the open sea. I was taught the best thing to do is act like a jelly fish. Dangle your arms, dangle your legs, slow your heartbeat down, and every 100 seconds or so, raise your head and take a breath.
Funny, I would relate an experience where the plane has not left the gate, the jet bridge is still attached and the door is still open to an open water survival technique.
I have to tell you, given the bizarre incidents exhibited by Al, I was pretty sure it was time to enact the jelly fish survival technique.
So…I immediately go into the jelly fish position. Arms slumped, head down, ear against the window, right eye closed firmly, left eye barely cracked open, ears on spidey alert level.
From this jelly fish position, I hear Al return with the gate agent, who earlier had graciously waived me on the plane when my phone died that was acting as my boarding pass.
Thus, he knew because I had given my ID, that I was a TSA approved, Nexus and Global Entry traveler. Basically, a professional traveler who treats safety and compliance with the utmost priority.
It was Friday evening that I was traveling from Buffalo to Chicago. My speech at the customer experience conference was Tuesday. I knew I could play this scenario out, still make bail, and have time to make my presentation at the conference.
Out of respect for my business partner, and consideration for those trying to make a connection in Chicago, I chose the jelly fish survival mode.
Now I could hear Al saying to the gate agent, “Her, Him, Him and Him, need to go.” I could see him pointing at me through my slightly squinted, barely open, left eye.
Then, with my heightened hearing I could hear the gate agent say, “Sorry, but it’s Al’s plane and the four of you must gather your belongings and exit the aircraft.”
I couldn’t see the others through my squinted left eye, however I think the other three implemented the jelly fish survival strategy as well.
What I know for certain is that every other remaining passenger hit the flight attendant call button. From my jelly fish position I could hear; Ding Ding Ding Ding Ding. That’s not right. That’s not right. Ding Ding Ding Ding Ding.
At some point, on flight #2839 everyone became united around respect and common courtesy.
None the passengers in seat 4A, 6A, 6B or myself in 8C, moved a muscle or looked up from their jelly fish position when the gate agent asked us to gather our belongings.
As I remained in my meditative jelly-like state, the next words I heard were that of the Captain. Even with my eyes closed, I could tell by his tone that logic was going to prevail.
He made a brief public announcement that safety and compliance were of the utmost importance and that indeed Al’s number one priority was our safety. He looked at each of us four passengers in the eye who had been put on the “Al list” and said, “Do you guarantee you will comply with all safety announcements and protocol from here to Chicago?”
Of which I jumped the gun and hit the flight attendant call button like I was in a game show — Ding Ding Ding — and said, “Captain, we have, we will and thank you Sir.”
He looked me in the eye, and without saying a word, I thanked him.
When we landed a short 90 minutes later, every passenger started hitting their flight attendant button as soon as the wheels hit the runway — Ding Ding Ding Ding Ding!
I think it was everyone celebrating the fact that we made it to Chicago, without further incident. Although there were six or seven completely hilarious things within the 90 minute flight that Al did, there was no further major incident.
I credit my jelly fish position for much of the positive outcome.
However, once everyone had exited the plane and was waiting on the jet bridge to retrieve their carry on baggage, the three primarily accused; 6A, 6B and myself 8C, gathered with the pilot to request Al’s employee ID number to file a formal complaint.
Al refused to share his employee ID number out of “safety” reasons. This had me laughing so hard I was crying. The fine Captain of American Airlines was standing in front of Al inside the galley with his employee ID proudly displayed on his badge hanging around his neck.
Because I had several days, I had the luxury of taking the time of filing a formal complaint. I felt a responsibility to everyone else who might be on the American Airlines system. If you get on a flight with a guy named Al and you see any of these symptoms, consider yourself warned.
With the Captain’s assistance, the help of my smart phone, and ability to use my cellphone safely on the taxiway, I had the head of Chicago – O’Hare customer service and flight operations meet us three passengers, the Captain, and other witnesses at the customer service center.
As I have written about previously, I went from a loyal Net Promoter to a loyal distractor. I realize it is a complex business and the actions of one customer service agent are very hard and almost impossible to control.
However, I feel it is my responsibility, yes even my duty, to hold an organization accountable for safety, respect and service.
In my humble opinion, if you are in the transportation business and you cannot do all three simultaneously, passengers will find someone who can.
P.S.
You really can’t script this stuff. Our cab ride from the conference in downtown Chicago back to O’Hare airport was even more memorable than Al and flight #2839
